Sunday, September 18, 2011

Wanting a Baby VS. Wanting to be a Parent

Sorry, I'm ranting today. Maybe it's a mommy hormone thing.

Have you or someone you known uttered the sentence, "I want a baby"?

I've said it.

What did I mean by that statement?

Did I mean that I desire to carry a baby in my womb even through discomfort, pain, or danger to myself? What if "too many" babies were growing in there? Would I get rid of one or more because I only want one?

 Aggie Catholics recently posted a video with Fr. Barron talking about aborting one twin and keeping the other. You might want to take a look/listen. 

What about financial hardship or inconvenience? When I said I wanted a baby, did I mean I wanted to nurture my child if she were crippled, sick, or deformed or would I only care about her if she were "perfect"?

Did I mean I wanted to mother her through long nights of illness or crying, days of exhaustion, but also of happiness, play, and growth--watching her develop from babyhood to talking and walking, or did I want to pass her off to a paid employee as soon as possible?

When I said I wanted a baby, did I mean I wanted to be a parent, or did I mean I wanted a possession to make me feel good? 

Parenthood is the most exhausting, frustrating, exhilarating, fulfilling adventure. 

Useful websites:

IVF alternatives

Healing after abortion:
Rachel's Vineyard

Article "Can I Stay At Home?" gives tips on being able to afford to be a stay at home parent.

You who are spiritual parents understand clearly what I mean when I say that our children don't belong to us, but to God. As spiritual parents you pray for your children, be they children or adults, and maybe guide them, but you are always aware that they are not yours, but God's. Physical parents often forget that our children are not ours. We have the privilege to be stewards or guardians, but not the right of ownership.  Just a thought.

I warned you I was on a rant. ;)

*All photos are of my own family. Copyright blah blah blah :P


  1. good post! I wanted a baby and when my first daughter was born I was in shock of how little I was sleeping! I wasn't counting on that! but, you take the good and the bad and you keep on going!


  2. Thanks. :)

    I had a very possesive attitude about my first. I was a single mom and proud of it. I didn't know a thing but thought I knew it all. How humble I became. LOL There was step-mothering-another humbling experience. By the time the twins came along I knew enough to know that I know little and that I have to kind of make it up as I go along. :P In many ways they're a breeze compared to everything else.